Now since I last graced this page, surprisingly quite a lot has happened to me. Firstly, one of my writers, Jonathan Waterlow, paid a visit to the big smoke and what a delight it was to come face-to-face with him. And no, he doesn’t look uncomfortable to be seen with me in the photo!

Following from that event, I bumped into the wonderful Mr Sacha Baron Cohen TWICE whilst looking for lunch in West London where I work. (That’s Sacha, not my lunch – I’m not that greedy!) Unfortunately I couldn’t get a picture of him as he doesn’t do photos “out of character”, but he was nice enough to sign a napkin as Borat inviting me for some sexy time!

In my quest to notch up another rendezvous with an older man, my opportunity finally came to meet the delectable and dishy Robert Lindsay (from such series as My Family), who is currently appearing in The Entertainer at the Old Vic theatre in London. I waited for 40 minutes with about four other people (yes, big crowd) and he was the last to emerge from the stage door.  Now I’d heard he can be a grumpy bastard so was hoping he would be in a good mood. He must have been for he was clutching a half empty bottle of red wine and he was sporting what appeared to be a weasily moustache. I thought it was a stuck-on one for the show but sadly I was mistaken.

Any way, grabbing the chance to stop him before he jumped into his swanky chauffeur driven car with Radio 2 on, my friend asked if we could have a picture taken with him. Without thinking (and this is something quite common with me), I then said: “Who would you like first?”

With a cheeky glint in his eye, he looked at me and replied, “I’ll have you!” before he grabbed me and gave me a big hug. (Yes, Sheenie’s still got it!) I look like I’m clinging on for dear life in the actual photo but hey, that’s one more ambition fulfilled. Of course Robert won’t steal Jon Snow’s crown but for a man of 57, he’s a mighty fine FILF.

Closer to reality, I’d like to say a little to thank you to the man on the train who gave up his seat for me and the guy who stopped his car on a busy road to allow me to cross. The latter might have something to do with the fact that I flashed a bit of leg as I hurried across but only a bit, OK? It’s not like I was wearing a belt. On a serious note, you might not think these are note worthy but if you live in London or indeed have visited this city, you realise these things are a big deal. So, as much as it pains me, it’s been a good week for men – chivalry isn’t quite dead.

Now the fellas have had a good week, so I guess the ladies are in for a bad one...

Put It AWAY! Underwear Should Not Be On Display!!

Yep, you heard me right and if anyone attempts to steal that catch-phrase I’ve ingeniously coined, I’ll be furious. I’m getting that printed on a t-shirt next week.

Any way, there is something so uncouth about ladies’ underwear on show. Most of the time, it’s just downright inappropriate. Women who need to put their racks on public display have no idea about how wrong it is and how hideous they look. It’s up there with wearing the wrong bra size which the majority do. Keep ‘em wrapped up like Christmas presents – only to be opened up for everyone to see one day of the year.

I also do not need to see the dental floss style panties and thongs poking out of the back of jeans with just a hint of crack. If you so badly want to put your arse on display, take up stripping or pole dancing! You get paid for it and with the money, you can buy some clothes that actually cover you up. There is a very good reason why underwear is called exactly that – it’s supposed to be UNDER what you WEAR. If some of these thongs/g-strings get any higher, you could slip them over your shoulders! Such a nasty, nasty image! Ahhh, rant over! I feel better – rejuvenated even!

Well, on the uk-fusion front we do have some spiffing reviews coming up. Look out for an Artic Monkeys live review plus one of their highly-anticipated album and hopefully some hot new interviews as well.

If you’d like to whine or whinge about anything, don’t keep it bottled up, shout it out. If it’s really good, you could be on this page. I’m also interested in hearing from any creative types who fancy showing me their stuff (I mean, written work). If that’s you, email either editor@uk-fusion.com or ryan.lee@uk-fusion.com.  Hope you enjoy our reviews. Keep reading and see you next week maybe? (Thanks, Ryan!)

Read previous editorials:

2007
2006
2005
2004