Affie has been locked in a cupboard by yours truly with a supply of Lucozade to keep her going for the week while I take the reins for a change. Don't worry, I taped a picture of Jon Snow on the inside of the door to keep her company and the dulcet sounds of Alan Cumming singing ‘Piff Paff Poff’ will keep her from going mad with the silence.

Any way, my darlings I just returned from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, quite possibly my favourite time of the year.  If you don’t know, every August Edinburgh plays host to the greatest entertainment shows you can find in the whole world. Shows span every genre from music and theatre to comedy and dance, with something for every sex, age group and sexual orientation. 

In total I saw six shows with five making me cry with laughter.  One was Manchester based comedy group Slaughterhouse Live who performed a snippet of their show on the high street. They sang satirical songs about the Iraq war dressed in big Aran jumpers and funny wigs so I decided to take the risk and go and see the show. These guys were fresh and original with sketches which had my boyfriend, Gary and I in stitches and I almost fell off my chair when they decided to pick on Gary and dedicate their song ‘I'm Gay’ to him before finishing with ‘Not in a Barrymore way’.

They don't just sing, they juggle guitars and huge bean bags, read bedtime stories that would make you blush, perform as a human clarinet, introduce you to ‘the smallest pope in the world’ and much more.  You must catch these guys, if you can. Check out their website or www.myspace.com/slaughterhouselive. 

And now I am back in my home in Aberdeen, pining for the Fringe. I also saw the infamous Puppetry of the Penis by the way but with Gary's sister as he thought it would be too painful.  We had a great time and I recommend it as you really do have to experience for yourself the sight of the male genitalia twisted into a snail. Weird but, boy is it funny! Can't wait for next year.