After they were famous/notorious, Steve Jones visited Brazil to record a song with Great Train Robber Ronnie Biggs. Lydon was stabbed by pro-royalist thugs objecting to the band’s alternative national anthem, 'God Save The Queen'. Vicious never did master the bass and ended up dying of a heroin overdose. Paul Cook drummed. For the likes of Bananarama and Edwyn Collins, following the Pistols’ implosion in January 1978.

Manager Malcolm McLaren inevitably takes centre stage. It would be easy to trace a bloodline from him to the original Svengali, if the latter was a real person rather than a fictional character in a George du Maurier novel. This mockumentary, written and directed by Julien Temple, rests on the premise that McLaren is outlining how to create a new Sex Pistols to wannabe big shot Helen of Troy. Ironically, she’s a dwarf.

So, we have McLaren speaking in capital letters: "FORGET ABOUT MUSIC AND SET ABOUT CREATING NEW GENERATION GAPS." Malcolm is all about myth-making. He insists none of the band could play their instruments. All obviously could, with the previously noted exception of Sid Vicious.

All in all, there’s too much McLaren. There’s even a shot of his flaccid penis in the bath. Now that’s something (not so) Big Mac should only share with his conquests.

Although he’s got far less screen time than Malcolm McLaren aka The Embezzler, there’s also too much Tenpole Tudor. Seasons may come and go, but there is one constant: the face of the future Crystal Maze presenter remains eternally inviting. For a slap. Tenpole Tudor punchbags, anyone?

Contrastingly, there’s too little Johnny Rotten aka The Collaborater. Having fallen out with his former manager, he wanted nothing to do with this vanity project. As a result, TGRNRS is best viewed as a companion piece to the later Filth And The Fury, also directed by Julien Temple, which features extensive contributions from JR. 

As well as live footage of the fantastic four performing classic punk tracks such as ‘Anarchy In The UK’ and ‘Pretty Vacant’, there’s quite a bit of animation. This includes a video for 'Friggin' In The Riggin', a track Steve Jones aka The Crook penned after the death of Sid Vicious aka The Gimmick and the departure of Rotten. It’s nonetheless a tricky undertaking to spot the difference between Vicious the cartoon character and the real-life Sid.

During the band’s final-ever gig at San Francisco’s Winterland Ballroom, prior to 1996’s surprise Filthy Lucre tour, a flu-ridden and thoroughly fucked-off Johnny Rotten asked the audience: "Ever get the feeling you’ve been cheated?" If the Great Rock N Roll Swindle demonstrates nothing else, it shows that ‘cheats’ do prosper, after all.

(3½/5)

Release Date: 06 June 2005

---

The Great Rock'n'Roll Swindle